When I was 21 years old, I had a boyfriend who was taking a Scientology course on how to study. We were college students, and he was pre-Law, so the information on the course was very important--it meant he could be a better student, achieve better grades and a successful law career. Anyway, I was not impressed--even though he was very positive on the subject. I, being a bit of a cynic, felt it wasn't a cool thing to do to demonstrate any interest in Scientology--and so I didn't. I purposely went a step further in demonstrating my "disinterest" and I criticized my boyfriend and out acquaintances for doing Scientology courses. Somehow, I really felt "out of the loop". I observed positive changes in my friends, who seemed so alert, intelligent and interesting. My boyfriend finally convinced me to start a course.

      The next night, I started a Communications Course. I was there solely because my boyfriend wanted me to be. The next night, it came time to start the second drill which sounds outrageously simplistic: we had to sit opposite another student and look at him and to be perfectly comfortable and at ease while doing so. It makes sense, after all, that to communicate with someone you must look at them. There are further drills which help you clearly put across a communication, help you listen, etc.

      Well, I slowly wrenched my eyeballs upwards out of my lap and they felt as if they had 50 pound weights attached to them. It must have taken me a full minute to meet the gaze of the other student. I felt agonizingly embarrassed and withdrawn. After 10 minutes or so, I began to relax and not flinch inwardly. I continued the drill, and by the end of the night I could do this comfortably. I felt wonderful. I felt as I had come out of some shell I didn't even know I was in. Suddenly, I realized I had not been observing things in my environment, or in life! This simple exercise caused me to be situated in the present, not with my attention riveted on something else at some other time or place. It was an exhilarating feeling--for possibly the first time ever, I was actually "seeing" the person in front of me, and not through some sort of filter.

      Needless to say, I went to the course night after night. But the big difference was that now I was going because I (emphasis on I) wanted to!

      This was just the start of many realizations of major magnitude regarding myself, life, others, this society, etc. Since studying Scientology, I can say that there are still problems in my life. The difference is that I can now see the source of the problems and I can use very specific technology available in Scientology to aid in their resolution.